By Hunter Perez

“Jock, will you please let me out of this?” I asked.

“Eventually, Bingo, but not right now,” he responded.

It was around eleven at night and we were in the basement den of Jock’s home. He was reclining on a couch, dressed in tight jeans and a black tank top that seemed to make his pale muscular upper torso glow. I was all in silver – or, to be more precise, I was trapped against a pillar while wrapped from ankles to shoulders in silvery duct tape.

“Look, I’m really sorry about what happened,” I said.

Jock chuckled and shook his head. “I’ve told you already, I’m not angry at you.”

I tried to push my arms against my duct tape imprisonment, but I was unable to move – the binding was too tight to allow even the slightest of wiggles.

“You’re not going to get out that,” Jock said as he watched me struggle. “Trust me, we used to do this in the Army and guys who were three times your size couldn’t break out of that. You might as well just relax and calm down.”

“This is kind of scary,” I insisted. “I feel like I’m paralyzed.”

“You’re not paralyzed,” he responded. “If you can wiggle your fingers, then you’re not paralyzed.”

I started to move my hands, which were tight against my body. “I can make a fist.”

“Great, but don’t do that – we had enough of that tonight,” he answered.

“So, you’re not angry at me?” I asked, hopefully.

Jock leaned back on the coach, putting his hands behind his head and flexing his biceps. “No, not at all. Admittedly, it was not how I expected the evening to go. Really, put yourself in my shoes. One minute I’m in the kitchen getting the wings and the mac and cheese ready when I hear what sounds like a WWE match taking place in the dining room. And then I go into the dining room and find Ralphie in the corner with a black eye, a bloody nose and a bowl of potato salad on his head while three twinks are trying to subdue you.”

“So, was it that bear Butch who choked me?” I said.

Jock laughed. “No, he was taking videos of the mayhem – I had to plead with him not to put it on Instagram. I was the one who put you in a sleeper hold that knocked you out – I also learned that in the Army.”

I tried again to push myself out of the duct tape, but self-liberation was impossible. “So, is Ralphie okay?”

Jock shook his arms and sat up. “Oh, he’s fine. His brother Eddie and I took him up to the guest room to lay down. He was yelling about having you arrested and suing me for damages, so I slipped him an extra sleeping pill I had in the medicine cabinet. Eddie’s staying, too, just to ensure Ralphie wakes up sane. And if it’s any comfort, Bingo, Eddie isn’t angry with you – he said that his brother started the fight.”

I grimaced and nodded. Jock stood up, stretched, and walked over to me.

“Bingo, tell me your version of what happened,” he said. “Ralphie told me his version, which bore no resemblance to what Eddie said. And Butch had his take on the situation. Tell me your version and let me see where that falls.”

I tried to adjust my shoulders, but the duct tape wouldn’t enable any attempt at body realignment. I swallowed and tried to avoid eye contact with Jock as he moved in front of me.

“Well, I was sort of minding my own business,” I began. “No one was talking to me, but nobody ever talks to me at your parties except Ralphie, and he’s always condescending. He came in with Eddie and he was loud – louder than usual. I assumed he already had too much to drink.”

“Yes, Eddie said he had a couple of beers before they got here,” Jock said, standing directly before me. He put his hand under my chin and directed my face to his. “I’m over here, Bingo.”

“I’m sorry,” I said. “Well, Ralphie starting talking – yelling, really, he was louder than normal. I don’t recall most of what he was saying, but he started to talk about a condo he bought someplace called Turks and Caicos. I didn’t respond and he asked if I ever heard of Turks and Caicos. I never heard of it and I asked if it had anything to do with Turkey. Then he started making fun of me and saying out loud how stupid I was.”

“Yes, that sounds like Ralphie when he’s had too many beers,” Jock said unhappily. “Keep going.”

I looked to Jock with sorrow and continued, “And then he said, very loud, ‘Why does our beautiful friend insist on hanging out with some idiot who looks like Barney Rubble?’”

Jock began to laugh but quickly caught himself, covering his mouth and turning aside, as if he was pretending to stifle a sneeze. He turned back and said with a barely straight face, “Well, that wasn’t very nice of him, was it?”

“No, it wasn’t,” I muttered. “So, I turned to walk away and he put his hand on my shoulder very hard, so I turned back and slugged him. I only hit him once, but he went flying into the corner of the room. He started to get up and…”

I stopped talking and closed my eyes. I then felt Jock’s hand tousling my hair.

“And then, Eddie gave you the bowl of potato salad to dump on his brother’s head,” Jock said. “Eddie denied it, but Butch showed me the video. I will say that pissed me off, because I spent a lot of time making that potato salad. It’s one you like, with the red chiles and the jalapenos.”

“Yes, I really like that,” I acknowledged. “I don’t know why he wanted me to do it.”

“Eddie hates my potato salad because it is too spicy for him, and he isn’t fond of his brother,” Jock said. “But in any event, your story is sort of a mix of Eddie and Butch’s stories.”

“And, so why I am in duct tape?” I asked.

Jock smiled and tousled my hair. “Because the guys upstairs were afraid you’d come out of the sleeper hold and start punching everyone in sight. To make sure the guys weren’t afraid to stay, Butch and I brought you down here and taped you up. Butch is upstairs entertaining the guests in my absence – you know how those twinks like Butch.”

“But I wouldn’t hurt anyone else,” I insisted. “I promise.”

Jock moved to the side and leaned against the pillar. My head’s movement was restricted, so I could barely see him from the corner of my eye.

“I know you won’t,” he said. “But, again, look at it from my perspective – how often do I get the chance to have a two-fisted, no-nonsense he-man taped up in my basement?”

I giggled at his remark. “You make me sound ridiculous. Like I’m some sort of a tough guy. Like I’m Barney Rubble with roid rage.”

Jock moved back in front of me and crouched so we had direct eye contact. “You don’t look like Barney Rubble, okay? And you are tough guy – tougher than anyone I know. I always think about the night we met and you saved my life. Really, Bingo, you could have been killed – those guys had knives – but you took them on by yourself to save me, even though you didn’t know me.”

I always felt uncomfortable whenever Jock reminded me of how we met – I didn’t see myself as the hero he insisted I was. I looked away from him and whispered, “Anyone would have done it.”

There was a silence for several seconds. Jock caressed my face and planted his lips on mine.

“Anyone didn’t do it – you did it,” he said softly. “What would you do if let you out of that duct tape?”

“I’d go home,” I said quickly.

Jock kissed me again and laughed. “No, that’s the wrong answer. I’d like you stay over tonight.”

I started to push against the duct tape that bound me. “But if I stay, then I’ll be here when Ralphie wakes up, and it’s…”

“And I will see to it that he apologizes to you,” Jock interrupted. “He’s not leaving here until he starts to show you the respect you deserve. And the three of us plus Eddie will sit down and have a civilized breakfast. And if Ralphie doesn’t behave, I’ll make an extra bowl of oatmeal that you can dump on him.”

I looked down at the duct tape and back at Jock. “So, I have to stay like this until…when?”

Jock wrapped his muscular arms around the pillar and pushed himself into my taped-up body. “Hey, it’s rude to leave a party early,” he said. He kissed me again, and then again, and then again. He rubbed his body slowly back and forth against mine and I could feel upward movement from my groin within my duct tape cocoon.

“Now, are you in such a hurry to be let out?” Jock sighed.

And with Jock’s next kiss, it dawned on me – being bound up in duct tape wasn’t such a bad thing after all.

The End