Trainer’s Bois

By rts

1. It is months now since I agreed to be here. I met Trainer online, a rubber/leather top looking for a boi to help out on his small ranch and looking for some bondage and play time in full gear. This place is a totally isolated 100 acres with a house and large barn. (I have never been allowed into the house, always kept in the barn ) .   When he met me at the airport I saw a well-built man taller than me, head shaved wearing black leather jeans, a tight rubber T-shirt, and red laced 20 hole Rangers.

Continue reading Trainer’s Bois

Bruce died last year while playing solo with a plastic bag


By Brian

Last year in January, Bruce, a dear friend (pictured above), died because he was playing solo, alone in his bed with a plastic bag on his head and a vial of poppers in his hand.

I only knew Bruce a couple of years, but we hit it of instantly, because he knew EXACTLY what I was thinking when we played, and I could somehow read him too. He’d have me tied down and he would somehow know just when to squeeze that nipple, tighten that restraint, or add something new to the scene to keep the excitement and adrenaline in full swing.

One night after everyone had gone to sleep, I was lying next to him in his bedroom, and he pulled out the bag and poppers and I watched as he suffocated himself to orgasm.

I remember saying, “You did that because I was here, right? You never do that when you are alone?” He told me, reassured me, that no he didn’t do it when he was alone. But there was a pile of plastic bags in the corner there always was, I sort of knew that maybe he did play like that when he was alone.

When I found out that he had died, and how he died, it made me sick. His closest friends, the people he lived with, were constantly warning him — don’t do that shit alone. Oh fuck, I wish he would have just listened.

I think what happens is it starts out pretty benign, you do a little, here and there, and before you know it, it becomes routine. And then one day, the routine ends.

If you must do breath play, don’t do it alone. Not once, not ever, and if you’ve done it alone before, never do it again. No one orgasm is worth giving up a lifetime of orgasms.

I loved Bruce, and I still miss Bruce to this day, damn it. And I’m still angry as hell at him for what he did.

For godsake, don’t do breath play alone.


Metalbond would like to thank Brian for posting the above to the comments section a few days ago. It is re-posted here as a main listing, with the blessing of Bruce’s surviving partner, Duane, who sent the following note:

“Time after time I told him not to do this alone! But like Bruce he came to me doing this, and left me this way. I had told him over and over my biggest fear was to find him dead — at least it was in his bedroom and not in the playroom! Try to explain that to all the people that were here that day! This just needs to STOP! Thank you!”

Thanks, Duane, for sharing. Hopefully this information will help save a life or two.

From today’s New York Times

Designer, 26, Found Dead in Apartment in Manhattan


Alejandro Bulaevsky was an accomplished lighting designer whose paths around the nation and world were well chronicled. On Tuesday, the New York police spent the day trying to learn how Mr. Bulaevsky, 26, ended up dead on the floor of his Lower Manhattan apartment — his body wrapped in a latex suit, his hands cuffed behind his back, his face covered by a gas mask.

“It’s a mystery, but they’ll figure it out in the end,” one investigator said.

Paul Browne, the Police Department’s chief spokesman said, “One aspect of the investigation would be to determine whether his death was related in any way to a fetish involving latex.”

To read the complete article, click here.

Do not play Russian roulette

Hey guys I have to get serious for a moment.  Really, this is important.

I have just learned that not one but TWO men have DIED within the past week alone, as the result of solo breath play. I don’t know the specific details of either of these incidents, but someone I know and trust has told me about them.

Apparently both of these guys were somehow cutting off their air while also playing with restraints. One of them might have been using recreational drugs at the same time, as well.

As I mentioned, I don’t know the details, just the big picture.

The fact is, breath control play is REALLY DANGEROUS — even with at least two people in the room.  It is NEVER a good idea to do this kind of play on your own.  People die this way all the time, probably many more than ever get reported in the news or within bdsm circles.  Even famous celebrities have died this way.

Listen, I don’t care how powerful your ejaculation might be — it’s simply NOT WORTH THE RISK to yourself and your loved ones. Find another way to get off. Rent porn movies instead, or take up fisting, or hire go-go boys. Just don’t suffocate yourself to cum. It’s not worth gambling your very life over. Can you imagine the HORROR your partner, your landlady, your neighbor or even your MOTHER will feel when they come into your room to find your lifeless body, wearing a gas mask or a hose around your neck and an open bottle of poppers in your hand? Don’t let that happen!

Seriously. And if you absolutely CANNOT GET OFF without strangling yourself, by all means — please — get somebody to be there with you.  If you don’t have a friend you can tell about your kink, make one.

Just don’t do solo breath play, ever.

Never, ever.

Metalbond answers reader mail

dear sir,

I really enjoy your blog and I hope to even visit you one day. I am a 25 year old bondage fanatic. Currently I live and work in los angeles and do not have the time or the means to travel to san francisco to meet the great masters that are located there. Whenever I search for bondage masters in los angeles, I hit a dead end. If sir would be so kind as to write a post to recommend some trustworthy, safe, discrete Masters who are located in the Los angeles or other southern california areas (such as palm springs, san diego, etc), I would be much obliged.


Bondage (especially metal)

Tickle torture

Cum control


Turn offs:

Anal or urethal penetration


Breath control


Thank you sir,

Boy Richard


Hey there Boy Richard,

Thanks very much for the note. I am sorry to hear that you have not connected with any masters in LA, but I do know for a fact that there are many sane, responsible tops in Southern California. You just haven’t found them yet.

One thing you might want to do is check out a local event, such as the Southern California Bondage Club. Here is their website:

In my view, a bondage club is a great way to explore bondage. If you go there, you will most likely have the chance to watch a variety of scenes, and you might even join in the play if you feel comfortable. Remember you can always stop the action at any time. The universal safe word at a play party is “safeword.”

If you haven’t already done so, you might also want to put up a profile on a BDSM-themed social networking site, such as Recon, and look for some men you find interesting there. One thing to keep in mind, is to look for men with pictures posted of themselves and their work/gear/playspace, and also make sure they have been online for some time and have plenty of friends listed. You might even politely chat up some of their friends to “check references.”  If you do make an arrangement to meet up with someone, it’s a good idea to meet first in a public location like a bar or a coffee shop. And if you can’t make it to the date, by all means be sure to call/email right away to cancel.

Whenever you visit someone for a bondage scene, be sure to be clear about your limits and make sure the other guy agrees.

Also, even more importantly, don’t ever forget to tell a trusted friend where you are going, and be sure the man you are visiting knows you are doing this. This is very important to ensure your safety. If you don’t have a friend you can tell, make one.

I hope this helps.

Have fun … and best wishes to you,


James Hatton passes away

James Hatton — who was known to many as Bodisama — died last week.

I never had the privilege of meeting or playing with him, but those who did spoke highly of him.


Metalbond offers his sincere condolences to James’ partner of more than 14 years, Matt, a person we should all keep in our thoughts.

More information is available by clicking here.

Waiting for Ross – End Game – Part 3

By an anonymous friend of Metalbond

Part 3

Forcing himself to enter full awareness, Tim wrestled in confusion. The dreams of sharp pain and oppressive constriction transcended his state of awareness. “Fuck, I hate this feeling,” Tim thought, as he realized his true dilemma. Passing from sleep to consciousness, mental images were replaced by physical sensations. Waking up in tight rubber bondage sometimes caused Tim to panic, and he battled now to contain his agitation.

Continue reading Waiting for Ross – End Game – Part 3