Category Archives: Daily Thread

Everybody needs to read this

Hey guys, this is really important, seriously.

Yet another one of us — “Spuds” — has apparently died in a play accident. I read about this on the blog of Rubber Canuck. Spuds is one of many others, including the men listed below, who have lost their lives in scene-related accidents:

James (Bodisama)

David (TieGuy) in the UK

Alejandro Bulaevsky (BikeRubber) found dead in full rubber in his NYC apartment

Bill (Bostoncuir)

David (Gummidawg)

Rubberpanther

Adrian Exley

I do not claim to have any firsthand knowledge of how any of the men listed above died. I only know what I have read online.

But it is really important that if you are playing with hoods, gags, breath restriction, or chemicals of any kind, that you know what the fuck you are doing. Yes, bondage and edge play can harden the dick, but don’t be careless with your life. Have a safety mechanism in place, a failsafe, a backup plan, a bondage buddy, whatever.

 

To read Rubber Canuck’s report on this latest incident involving Spuds, click here.

Clips vs locks

OK fuckers, listen up. This is important. Really important. In fact, I think this might be the most important blog posting I have ever put up here on Metalbond. I mean it. It has to do with the use of clips versus locks. Here’s the problem I am having: There are far too many men out there doing ineffective bondage with stupid, worthless CLIPS that can be un-clipped by the prisoner whenever he wants, rather than using LOCKS that cannot be undone without a key.

Bondage with clips makes no sense whatsoever. It’s like driving to the mall on a busy Saturday afternoon and locking your car doors, but leaving all your windows rolled down. What’s the point?

Take the picture below, for example:

(picture)

Yeah, the guy is smoking hot and he looks great with his hands behind his back. But look a bit more closely at the way he is restrained. All he has to do is use his hands to unclip the clips, and he is free. What fun is that? This is not real physical restraint. It is play-acting!

Here are more examples of hot men who are “restrained” with inadequate, non-secure clips:

The men in the pictures above were restrained by lazy tops who don’t know what the fuck they are doing, or who don’t care. Is this any way to treat a prisoner? No. Fuck no. If they had been bound with PADLOCKS rather than clips, these would be some very hot predicaments, indeed!

Are you catching my drift here?

Another thing to keep in mind, is that if you do use locks, you also have to know HOW to use them. Some guys use their padlocks ineffectively, because either the restraints themselves are not locked on, or the restraints are locked on but then they are secured with clips. Remember that if you are using leather restraints, those have to LOCK ON, as well! Take these pictures, for example:

Clips vs locksClips vs locksEven though padlocks ARE used in the scenarios shown above, all the guys in these pictures have to do is either unbuckle the leather restraints or unhook the clips and they are free! That is because there are not locks on both the restraints AND whatever is securing them. Again, this is an ineffective, unacceptable way to restrain a prisoner!

Then there is THIS heinous misuse of a padlock:

(picture)

What the fuck does this padlock do? Absolutely nothing! It is not keeping the collar on, nor is it locked TO anything. Like tits on a bull, this padlock is just sitting there, being useless. What a waste of a good padlock!

From now on, everyone needs to start using real, locking PADLOCKS to secure the restraints and then lock them TO something. No more clips, only padlocks.

If you don’t HAVE padlocks, that is no excuse. Go to Home Depot, for chrissakes, where you can buy dozens of different kinds of locks, in all different sizes, shapes, colors and configurations. You can get multiple locks that all open with the same key. You can even get combination locks that all open with the same combination, or you can get combination locks that you can set your own combination into, and use over and over again.

 

Then once you are properly equipped you can do REAL BONDAGE, like THIS:

Clips vs locksClips vs locks

Notice how the restraints keeping these men captive are properly locked on, so the restraints can in turn be properly locked TO something. These men will not be able to get out of their predicaments on their own. They are true prisoners, locked and secure — the way it should be!

Clips vs locksClips vs locksI hope I have made myself clear. Any questions?

Marching to the beat of a different drummer

MetalbondNYC_dot_com_JohninParis

JOHN H. EMBRY 1926-2010

John H. Embry, pioneer gay author, publisher and activist, died in his sleep at the age of 83 on the morning of Thursday, September 16, 2010 at his home in San Francisco.

After a successful career in advertising and marketing, John founded the groundbreaking magazine Drummer, which became the most successful national publication for gay men in the leather lifestyle.

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John published the magazine from its inception in 1975 until 1986, when he sold it.

John and founding Editor Jeanne Barney shared a vision: To produce a magazine that celebrated the masculine gay male, while embracing the literary values of the Evergreen Review, a publication famous for content that was counter to the culture and sexy. As such, they attracted such talent as Phil Andros (Sam Steward), Scott Masters (Edward Menerth), Fred Halsted, Tom of Finland, Harry Bush and Robert Opel, among others.

It is impossible to overstate the importance of Drummer. For the first time, gay men across the country – particularly gay men in small-town America – saw masculine images of themselves and not the stereotypes presented in mainstream media. Through their encounter with Drummer, many gay men realized that there were others like themselves “out there.” At the same time, the magazine highlighted gay leather bars and businesses and gave those establishments a national venue.

The impact became even greater when, because of police harassment in LA, the magazine moved to San Francisco in 1977, generating an influx of gay Leathermen to the Bay Area.

Drummer was a significant contributor to the creation of the international Leather Community and gave birth to such famous San Francisco social events as the California Motorcycle Club (CMC) Carnival and the Mr. Drummer contest.

 

“Drummer presented an image of gay men previously unknown to me. When I saw the photos of the hot guys having fun at the Drummer parties in San Francisco, I gave two weeks notice and headed West.”

— Jerry Lasley, Embry’s business partner and husband

“John Embry was a pioneer of Leather who made gay male Leather/SM writing and art available to a whole generation of Leathermen. Those men were inspired and creatively brought out by his Drummer and other magazines over a 35-year period of Leather history. His influence is still felt today in gay men’s mass media, not just porn, but in mainstream gay media of all kinds from movies to art and writing!”

— Peter Fisk, longtime San Francisco Leather community organizer

“Most of us may never have had the introduction to this Leather scene had it not been for John Embry and the Original DRUMMER Magazine he started and published. I know it’s how I first realized I wasn’t alone in all my perverted fantasies. Finding that Drummer magazine on a newsstand in New Orleans in 1981 changed my life, and you can see where it all led for me. Tens of thousands of guys worldwide read Drummer every month and felt a bonding connection to each other because of it. John died peacefully last month here in San Francisco. His legacy stands for itself. I wonder if he realized what he was creating when he was in the middle of it all.”

— Richard “Big Daddy” Hunter, owner of Mr S

“When I was a young teen, my family moved to a new city (Bedford/Temperance, Michigan) in the middle of the school year (one of the worst things you can do to a kid) where I was thrust into to a very WASPy school. Yeah, it was rough. I knew nobody and they were just looking for a target. What made matters a bit worse was that I was one of those future Gay Kinsters who was discovering he was KINKY …  before he discovered he liked MEN. I remember lusting over football uniforms, wrestling singlets, the motorcycle leathers in the SEARS catalog, etc.

“Since my parents didn’t pick up on how scared shitless I was to go to school each day and that I didn’t have friends (and my father could really care less), I’d go to the library after school. I tried to figure out my fascination for fetishes. This led me to books on sexuality where they always had a few pages on Fetish … and BDSM. And at the back of the book were the references. Where I found DRUMMER MAGAZINE.

“*A lot* of who I am today is by Drummer Magazine. At first, with a Post Office Box, I just ordered back issues with money orders. Got a subscription shortly after. Yes, at age 16.

“Each month that I got the magazine, I would have a masturbation marathon. Reading each magazine from front to cover several times. I’d also get on other mailing lists that I found in the advertisements. Which is where I discovered another influence, Mr S Leather (great article at that link on Drummer Magazine)

“I read today that the Publisher of Drummer, John Embry, passed away recently. While I never knew the man, I read his stuff and wish I could tell him thanks. I learned much from his magazine. I learned about HIV/AIDS prevention from his magazine wayyy before I got any kind of education at School or anywhere else. There was also many articles about the importance of respect, safe & consenting sex, roles and brotherhood.

“So, many thanks to you, John. I’ll see you later in that big dungeon in the sky.”

— Ruff, author of the popular Ruff’s Stuff bondage and SM blog

Drummer magazine publisher John Embry, who has died (1926-2010), hired me as founding San Francisco editor in chief of Drummer in 1977. Developing Drummer during the Titanic 1970s, Embry and I worked on leather articles intensely and then intermittently through 2002. He will be missed by the thousands of writers, artists, photographers, and staff who created Drummer.

— Jack Fritscher

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Nathan Hale statue

Two Metalbond readers who were recently visiting Chicago sent some pictures of this statue in front of the Tribune Tower:

MetalbondNYC_dot_com_01_nathancute

Here’s what they had to say:

We were walking around Chicago this weekend and walked past the statute of Nathan (“My only regret is that I have but one life to give for my country ” )  Hale that’s outside the Chicago Tribune building on Michigan Avenue. We never really looked closely at it before, but … gee … the guy is hot, if green, and his hands are tied behind his back. And it looks like he has a pretty rocking body under all that bronze 18th Century finery. We thought of your blog and took these pics for you.

MetalbondNYC_dot_com_02_nathantied

Intrigued, I looked this up online, and learned that the statue is a replica of Bela Lyon Pratt’s 1912 statue that stands on the campus of Yale University — pictured below flanked by two hot Yale servicemen on Yale campus in New Haven, Connecticut in November 1917:

MetalbondNYC_dot_com_03

Nathan Hale (1755-1776) was a soldier for the Continental Army during the American Revolutionary War. Widely considered America’s first spy, he volunteered for an intelligence-gathering mission but was captured by the British. He is best remembered for his speech before being hanged following the Battle of Long Island, in which he reportedly said, “I only regret that I have but one life to give my country.”

The 6-foot tall sculpture depicts Hale, hands tied behind his back, the moment before his execution.

There are several other replicas of the statue in addition to the one in Chicago. Copies also stand at the Phillips Academy in Andover, Massachusetts; the Nathan Hale Homestead in Coventry; the Connecticut Governor’s Mansion in Hartford; Fort Nathan Hale in New Haven; the Department of Justice in Washington, D.C.; and at the headquarters of the Central Intelligence Agency in Langley, Virginia.

Does anyone else know of other works of public art depicting hot guys in bondage — maybe with less bronze on?

Chuck is locked in Yossie’s cell

This is a private cell owned and built by Yossie, the famous handcuff collector (see Yossie’s Handcuff Collection). It features concrete and rebar walls, and a 4-inch thick concrete reinforced ceiling. If you look closely you can see a loop of rebar protruding from the floor in the back corner of the cell, which is used for attaching chains. In this case the chain is attached to the prisoner’s collar and is of sufficient length to allow him to stand but not long enough for him to reach the barred wall and door of the cell. His collar is RIVETED on, and can only be removed with a power saw.

You can see more pictures of inmate Chuck in a posting titled “The Chain gang” at the Serious Male Bondage website.

MetalbondSF

Castro

I am in San Francisco this week, and I am staying with the guys who run the Serious Male Bondage website. Yesterday we visited Kink.com, parent company for Bound Gods. We got to meet and interview Van Darkholme — who is much hotter in real life — and he gave us a rare, behind-the-scenes tour of some of the sets they use for the Bound Gods movies. Van told us about a brand new website he is launching, which I am sure will be a huge hit.

We also visited Mr S, and Richard Hunter gave us a behind-the-scenes tour of not only the store, but also his private playroom. Wait until I tell you about his padded isolation cell!

Tonight we are having dinner with Mikey of the popular Guys Tied Up bondage blog and his partner, Daddy Tony, and Yossie, the world-famous pervert and handcuff collector.

More pictures and information coming soon to Metalbond . . .

Mentalbond

So I had another session with Neil the Erotic Hypnotist, and I have been meaning to write about it. (If you missed the posting on my FIRST erotic hypno session with Neil, click here.) Neil knows how to use hypnosis for bondage and control. This time, we decided to start at my place and then take the action to the New York Bondage Club for some play in public. It turned out to be a memorable evening.

New York Bondage Club

Neil came over late on a Sunday afternoon, and we spent some time discussing the various goings-on in our lives, some of the mutual friends and acquaintances we have and our respective workout routines (Neil spends a lot of time in the gym, and it shows).  We also talked about New York City real estate. That’s because whenever two or more New Yorkers get together for any reason, under any circumstances, the conversation always, inevitably, touches on real estate at some point. It is an un-alterable law of nature, just like that of gravity.

Anyway, after our catching up on a social level, we decided it was time for me to go into a trance under Neil’s guidance, to be prepped with triggers for our visit a bit later to the Bondage Club. The focus of our play was again to be on bondage and control, without the use of restraints.

Neil had me lie back on my futon and get comfortable. I had darkened the room. The air conditioning was on, making the temperature pleasant. The phone ringers were turned off. The key was for me to relax, to listen to Neil’s voice as he coached me to let myself fall into a deep, almost dreamlike state of consciousness. I remember he told me at one point, after I had closed my eyes and started to drift away, that my right arm was light as a helium balloon. I did sense that my arm started to rise up off the futon, as it if really were lighter than air. It was an interesting feeling.

Neil also gave me several mental triggers that he planed to use on me later. One of them, “cuffs,” meant that I was to clasp my hands tightly behind my back as if they were cuffed, until he gave the “release” command. Another trigger, “statue,” meant that I was to remain frozen in place, unable to move, until released. He also gave me a command called “grab,” which meant that I would grab onto an object and not let go. He also gave me commands to feel “horny” and “sensitive.”

After Neil brought me out of the trance, he tested the triggers on me in my apartment, and, satisfied that they were working, we departed my place and headed for the Bondage Club. When we got there, I stripped down to just my boots and gave Neil all of my clothes to put in his backpack.

I’ve been going to the New York Bondage Club for many years, even way back when they met at J’s, and I know that some nights there are better than others. The club this particular night had an interesting crowd and a nice vibe.

One of the first things Neil did was get my hands “restrained” behind my back using the “cuffs” command. With my hands behind my back, we walked around the club and viewed some of the other scenes that were playing out. To me, it felt like my hands really were restrained, just as if they were tightly tied with rope or leather. They did not budge as we wandered about.

We weren’t the only ones playing, of course. There was a fit young man getting tied down with actual restraints on his back with his ass up in the air. Another dude with a large dick was tied inside a cage, then tickled and tormented. In another area of the club, a guy was giving erotic massages. At one point Neil had me “cuffed” around a post while we watched a particularly interesting scene, and during this time I was rock hard. He also took me over to the bondage chair the NYBC has built into a wall and had me sit down, feet firmly planted on the floor, and he ordered me to “grab” the rings so that my arms were splayed out in a wide spread eagle. Normally at the Bondage Club, a man would be TIED into such a position. But, with hypnosis, Neil was able to have me restrained here without the use of any ropes or cuffs. He kept me like that for quite a while, and it was interesting to watch the reactions of some of the other club-goers as they walked by and witnessed the situation I was in.

Later, after we had played for a while and got a bit more relaxed, we showed some of the other guys there, including several of the regulars, what we were doing. Many of these other guys were intrigued and asked some interesting questions. Mike, who runs the Bondage Club and who has seen me engage in lots and lots of play there over the years involving lots of equipment taken out of my gear bag, was impressed that I was tied up mentally, without actual physical restraints.

One thing I definitely noticed at the Bondage Club is that I seemed to respond more to the triggers involving physical restraint and control, rather than to the commands involving the way I was to feel or to perceive sensations. For example, I really did feel that my hands were actually locked behind my back for stretches of time. In fact, when Mike tried to pull my wrists apart to test this, he was unable to. My arms were securely locked behind my back. The triggers also worked very well when Neil had me grab those rings in the wall and stay that way — I was like that a long time, well past the point at which holding the position became uncomfortable.

But when Neil gave the commands to make me feel “horny” or that my skin would be “sensitive,” I can’t really say with certainty that these sorts of commands had much effect.

Maybe this is more because I enjoyed being ordered around by a hot, muscular guy, rather than I was under the effects of hypnosis. I’m not really sure. And it’s also what makes me wonder about the effectiveness of hypnosis itself. Upon discussing the session later with Neil, he insisted that the hypnotic restraints were in no way voluntary.

“It’s true that you had no problem keeping your hands behind your back, but you also didn’t have much of a choice,” Neil told me in a follow-up email. “I know that with hypnosis it’s often hard to tell the difference, since the conscious mind has a tendency to rationalize things,” he said.

I guess Neil might say he created an undeniable force for me — something akin to gravity.

Nevertheless, no matter what Neil says, and no matter how hot all this was, and despite everything I have read recently on the topic of hypnosis, I must admit that I am STILL a little skeptical of it all. Maybe I just need to experience more hypnosis sessions, as I understand it does take practice to go into deeper trances.

The bottom line is that I am glad that Neil and I had this new session — and I am definitely curious enough to do more of this type of play in the future. Next time, perhaps, we can focus on other forms of control, like getting me to exercise longer and harder at the gym. Neil tells me this type of control is another of his specialties.

To learn more about Neil, you can visit his personal website by clicking on his picture, directly below:

Neil the Erotic Hypnotist