By Joshua Ryan
Chapter 14: A Brief Introduction to Our Personnel Policies
And fuck! There I was! The total package! Brown boots, brown shorts, brown shirt, brown cap—an SLP servant from head to foot! I’d like to say, “I didn’t even recognize myself,” but too bad, I’d need to change that to “almost didn’t”! Still—HUGE change, even from the way I was, back at my brief visit to Patrick’s browns. I’d been putting on some weight, I mean muscle, but most of it was attitude. That SLP on my chest was yelling “watch out for this dude!” And of course the collar—“this bad boy needs to be collared!” SO cool! I couldn’t stop repeating: I’ll be in SLP gear for the rest of my life! It wasn’t one of those remakes that happen when you visit the mall and decide to get with the trends. What I saw in the mirror was me–the permanent me.
I put my hands on my hips and turned this way and that way, raising my arms and flexing my muscles like you see dudes doin on Mashbook or whatever, just likin what I saw. I grabbed the brim of my cap and pulled it off, wondering what I’d look like without it. Still good! I mean, who is this tough guy with the bald bald skull? Can it be Slappie Number 24250, the former Joel Barlow? Wow! It definitely changes you! But I think I liked it better when I was wearing my cap. I liked the all-brown look.
